First off, I would like to send a big birthday shoutout to my wonderful mom who inspires me on a daily basis with her dedication to her faith, family, and career. She truly is the most selfless person out there and I am so blessed to have her as a role model as someone who fully embodies a strong and independent woman.
With Valentine’s day coming up this Saturday, I figured I would dedicate this post to the chocolate filled, stuffed animal, flowery, “I love you/ no, I love you!” day. According to the number of candles I blew out on my last birthday cake, this Valentine’s day marks the 21st year where I will be spending the day as a single gal (while receiving chocolates from my parents). Now, at this point, if you’re thinking “awe, that’s so sad”, I want you to please stop, as there is really nothing to feel sorry about. Plus, this post is far from a plea for sympathy. (:
Now don’t get me wrong, I personally don’t mind Valentine’s day and I look forward to my first V-Day where I get to spend it with my significant other, curled up watching a movie (and of course eating awesome food). However, in the meantime, I refuse to feel “sorry” for myself and throw a pity party and so should you! While I do think it’s important to go out of your way to show your love and appreciation for your partner, I do believe that it can be and should be done on every day of the year.
For many women (and men) out there, this day may be an annual reminder of “look, another year and you’re still alone”. My hope for this post is that it helps you realize that February 14th is just another day, and just like the other 364 days of the year, there is no reason why you cannot enjoy it, single or not single.
So if you’re single and thinking “what am I going to do on Saturday?”, let me give you some suggestions!
1) Go on a date with yourself. (aka “treat-yo-self”)
Learning to spend time alone with yourself is a powerful thing as it is so important to have personal “check-ins” frequently. Now don’t get me wrong, I am an extrovert through and through and I get energy from being around people. However, I am learning that time alone is essential for personal growth and improvement. Go to that favourite coffee shop and write down goals for yourself or if you don’t want to be out in public, order take out and enjoy a nice night in watching movies. I know you’re probably thinking “how pathetic”, but if you can learn to be alone on the most relationship-emphasized day of the year, then the rest of the year is going to feel like a breeze! Embrace your singleness: it’s not a waiting period, it’s not something to be embarrassed or ashamed about, it’s just where you’re at right now and there’s nothing wrong with that! (:
Audrey Hepburn said is best, “the secret of being happy is accepting where you are in life and making the most out of everyday”.
2) Do something thoughtful for someone else.
Chances are, if you spend the day thinking about how you can bless someone else’s day and then do go out and do it, the less time you’ll have to sit around and feel sorry for yourself. Take a girlfriend out to the spa and have some “girl time” or take your friend out to a movie or dinner. Just because you aren’t romantically involved with the person doesn’t mean you have to stay at home and allow all the couples to enjoy being out in public. I remember in junior high, my friend Chloe Larsen and I went on a dinner and movie date and had the best night ever. I still look back on that Valentine’s day and smile thinking about it. The day is all about enjoying someone else’s company – whether that is your own, your family’s, your friend’s, or significant other’s.
3) Make a list of what you are thankful for.
As mentioned, Valentine’s day can be a day filled with thoughts about what you wish you had or a day that emphasizes what you are currently lacking in your life. On Saturday morning when you wake up, I want you to write down at least 10 things that you are currently thankful for in your life. If you’re thinking that 10 may seem like a lot, think on a smaller scale. Is your fridge full? Are you healthy? I hope you get the point… You’ll be amazed how starting the day with the right mindset will drastically set the pace for the rest of your day.
e31. is a space that emphasizes self confidence, outer -but more importantly- inner beauty, and personal contentment. As I mentioned in my last post of 2014, you can have the most expensive outfit on in the world, but until you have that inner confidence and contentment with being your authentic self, material objects are not going to fill that void. Same thing goes for Valentine’s day: you can have the most beautiful, Chase-Crawford-look-alike at your side, but until you learn to love yourself and have that inner confidence that is not rooted in a guy, it is going to be just another disappointing day. We are strong, independent women and regardless of our relationship status, we need to believe that we are beautiful and full of value- value that is not determined by a guy.
One of the most unexpected but powerful moments of the Grammy’s on Sunday was Katy Perry’s intro by Brooke Axtell who spoke about domestic violence and knowing your worth. In case you missed it, watch her powerful story below.
I love when Brooke says that “authentic love does not devalue another human being”. This realization is so vital when choosing to be in a relationship or not.
I hope I’ve inspired you to make some plans if you were thinking of just moping around at home all Saturday. Remember, it’s just another day: you are beautiful and you are loved- believe it! If I could jump out of your computer screen and give you these flowers, I would. (:
Before I finish, I just wanted to talk about this outfit. In case you haven’t notice, burgundy is my all time favourite colour. It’s bold and it’s rich. I originally bought the top and bottom on two separate occasions, but one day, it dawned on me that together, the burg on burg would look killer and it could create a jumpsuit-kind-of-look. With both pieces being made from similar fabric, there is consistency throughout which is essential. I am absolutely obsessed with these Cohen pants and I am waiting to dedicate an entire post on them in the future so stay tuned! You’ll hear me say it over and over again: don’t be afraid to take risks and be bold with your outfits- you never know what the combination will look like until you try it on!
I truly hope that this Valentine’s day is the best one yet for everyone who is in a relationship or not.
Until next time, work hard and be nice to people!